the future and my vocation

Well, I've been thinking a lot lately (and by lately I mean all of my teenage years) about the future, specifically, what I will be doing in the future. I have also been trying to live in the moment/"now", but I'm gonna have to put that goal aside for this blog. The main debate going on inside my head is the tension between my will and having no clue how to figure out God's will. I've grown up always wanting to do God's will, but I've always been fuzzy on the details about how I would actually know what to do. And this is becoming very apparent in this period of my life in which I have to think about senior year, college, majors, jobs/careers, and yes, even relationships. (sigh) When it has come time to make decisions like senior courses and what colleges to look at, it has felt like I'm completely relying on what I think is best for me. I'm not sure how to consult God on such decisions. Is it just a matter of using my reason (a gift from God) as best as possible? That cannot be because the limited nature of the human mind could not even start to realize the complexity and majesty of God's plans to work through us. So I guess I'm just venting my frustration at what I really need to do, listen. I happen to consider myself a good listener, but that may be because I surround myself with people who talk...a lot (namely, my mom, but many, many others as well-you know who you are! and I love ya for it!). But I don't think God is going to talk to me in a similar manner. Patience and trust. Those are the two things I think I need to effectively listen to God. I guess what I'm really thinking about is vocation. What is God calling me to do? to be? How am I to best serve God? By being a preist? married? deacon? brother? single? I've already stated what my preference is (marriage, if you didn't know), which I would think is everyone's natural inclination. So I want to know how a priest realized his calling and how he accepted it. If any priests read this, please email me. and if any people with other vocations read this want to impart some wisdom, please email me as well. (but I dont think anyone reads this blog anyway-email me if you do, please!!! just so I know) cause when I picture the possibility of being a priest I visualize (falsely I'm sure) a rather lonely life, and what happens to those romantic feelings? I'm not sure if this means anything, but just talking about this topic makes me yearn for a married life. and kids! It would be wonderful to be a stay at home dad. at least half of the time. that would be my ideal situation. to be married. to have, oh I don't know, maybe four kids, to have a job that I love, but allows me to be a stay at home dad half the time, and for my wife to have the same. that would be awesome! but none of that could possibly come about if it wasn't because I had been open to God's will and had been led to that situation. ahhhh, the uncertainty of the future! this is where the trust come in. and the benefit of only living in the moment (the present moment is all we ever actually have anyway). so i guess i better snap back into reality and start listening.