A series of 6 posts too small to stand alone

Prom was last friday night. I went with Sara, of course. We took pictures in Tower Grove park. It was so beautiful, and my mom was such a professional photographer that I decided not to pay for an actual professional photo with a blue background and single fern. Dinner was good. I ate slowly, which is normal for me when I'm eating vegetables. The table conversation was, um, interesting. Very entertaining, of course, if risque. And then the dancing. Oh the dancing. Well, the dj certainly left something to be desired. Over 90% of the music was rap. Which is understandable. Rap has a strong beat and is generally very easy to dance to (how would you dance to rock music? like AC/DC?). But still, it got old. And there were only 3 slow songs the whole night. Disappointing. But I did have a lot of fun dancing with my friends, in spite of it all. The sugar eventually wore off, and I got weary of dancing, but that's to be expected. I apparently surprised several of my classmates with my "wild side" on the dance floor. And in a good way, nonetheless. Woot. Then we went to a classmate's house for an afterparty. I didn't know what to expect, so it was a little boring. But at least it was clean. And any time spent with Paul and Joey is going to be enjoyable. It was a good end to a great day.

I did a total of 15 minutes of studying for my 3 exams this week. So summer really started Friday. Or last Tuesday, even- after turning in my history paper. There is a lot I'd like to do this summer. I'll be seeing about a summer job friday morning. Other than that distasteful engagement, I'd like to camp, hike, swim, bike. Maybe take a trip to Colorado? I'd like to read every day. I have a bad habit of not finishing books that I'd like to break. I'll have Project Life, the service retreat that remains a major turning point in my life, one last time. I'll get ready for college. I want to explore St. Louis more fully- Botanical Gardens, Left Bank bookstore, the Art Museum, Central library, and Soulard Market. I'd like to picnic with friends. Maybe even under the arch? I will sleep 8 hours a night and still wake up by mid morning. I'll practice my cooking skills. Take guitar lessons. Learn massage therapy. Learn yoga. Meditate. Maybe begin to learn some German. I'll keep volunteering at Karen House. I'm interested in exploring the bus routes- get lost by bus and find my way back by bus. And finally, I want to explore other churches, especially the Society of Friends congregation close to me. So I'll be busy, to say the least. And I didn't even mention all of the time just hanging out with friends.

One of my friends is going to a really cool college, called Northland. Their emphasis is on environmental stewardship, something I'd like to bring to Saint Louis University more fully. I'm a little jealous of his college choice. It does sound like a really cool place. I was realizing last night that I have no sense of what phase the moon is in right now. And I found that disturbing. I think Northland is a place where you'd be aware of such a thing. That doesn't mean I can't be aware of it on my own. SLU is a somewhat homogenous environment. I anticipate with pleasure spicing it up.

A mentor of mine from school/Karen House shared with me the reality of the disconnection I would experience if I cut myself completely off from entertainment. While I won't have much time for such activities anyway, I think I should just focus on cutting out the crap. I do truly enjoy some television shows- like Gilmore Girls. And even the Simpsons. I don't know why my parents prevented me from watching such an involved and educational show growing up. I certainly watched worse things (that were not cartoons) growing up. I'll have to wait and see what my roommate will be like to know how much entertainment I'll be taking in, at least for the first year of college.

I am intelligent, but I am also very slow. This became readily apparent to me this past school year, sharing so many classes with Paul. His wit is quick, and he always has something interesting and worthwhile to say. I'd like to emulate him, develop critical thinking more. There is a document jesuit high schools use, the graduate at graduation. It outlines where a graduate of the high school should be after four years of jesuit education: open to growth, intellectually competent, religious, loving, and committed to justice. I personally think I'm ready to graduate, based on those criteria. But I've also realized that I have not been trying my best in school. I've been coasting- distracted by other, probably less important things. I want to do my best in everything I do. It's a little late for high school, but I'd like to apply my former work ethic to whatever I'll be doing in the immediate future.

If you looked up "confessional style blogging" in the dictionary, you'd find the address for this site. I've decided that I'm comfortable with the world knowing what is going on inside my mind and life. I haven't gone into every corner of my life, and I could never share all of it, but I'm making progress. This blog is like the safety drawers they have at gas stations for the cashiers, protecting them from robbery/attack. It is a safe place, a go-between, where I can put my "thoughts, opinions, journals" out there, and then anyone can come freely and see what I'm up to. I don't think I could ever talk about all of this stuff out loud to a group of people- not for very long, at least. But this medium helps me open up and think out loud "on paper" and share those thoughts. I understand wanting privacy from unwanted outside intrusion, but I don't personally feel a need to keep much of my life private. What do I want to hide, and from whom? What's the point? I could seriously be missing something big, so please let me know what the benefit of anonymity is.